From Captain's Fury by Jim Butcher, p. 372
Tavi nodded slowly. "Can you tell me what gadara means? Describe it."
Varg gave Tavi a very Aleran-looking shrug. "It means that you are a foe that is equal. Honorable. Trusted."
"A trusted enemy?" Tavi asked. "And you name your son as such?"
"Enemies are far more faithful than friends, Aleran, and more dependable than allies. One can respect an enemy far more easily than a friend. It is considered a mark of respect," Varg said.
This brief passage from the six-volume series which begins with The Furies of Calderon (that I am enjoying greatly during my summer off from studying more substantial material) brought to mind the many noble friends who have graced my life. These are people with whom, or on whom, I have sharpened some aspect of myself, my awareness, or my skill set in dealing with 'challenging' people. I remember the first time I heard the term 'noble friend', I thought the speaker was crazed. Why would I even think about calling these people who were so intent on making my life difficult 'friends'? It wasn't until I looked back with the perfection of 20:20 hindsight that I could see the gifts that these noble friends had given me.
Predominantly the gifts I received from noble friends included clarity and boundaries. Any time I didn't know my edges, I dreamed up someone who was more than happy to show me where I was porous or overly fluid in my boundaries. I've also received help with being clear what I expected out of relationships and with situations in my life. There's a quote "keep your friends close and your enemies closer." I used to think that was simply so that I could see what my frienemies were doing and to increase the ease with which I could take appropriate action, but I am coming to see it has more to do with being more present to receiving the gifts they give me.
What fun!
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